Ever since my mother took me hunting for second-hand treasures at “The Opportunity Shop,” when I was a girl, I’ve been a fan of all things recycled—tag sales, thrift shops, freecycling (before I knew what it was), flea markets, craigslist, you name it.  And it’s not just about the bargain – it’s the thrill of the find, and the feeling of resourcefulness that I didn’t go overspend on something new or contribute to waste, because a perfectly good alternative already existed within my reach. I also tend to get more interesting stuff, and better quality furniture than I could afford at an overpriced department store. The second-hand idea just always made sense to me, even before everyone went green, and the recession made us all tighten our belts. I’ve never felt any shame in it, in fact I giddily dart between yard sales in my town every Saturday morning, and proudly point out my treasures to anyone who will listen.

But I have to admit that when we got rid of our landline phone recently, I didn’t tell anyone. They found out by calling our house, and getting a recording giving them my cell phone number.  In retrospect, I realize I was kind of embarrassed. I think I worried that people would think that we can’t afford it, or worse, that it was disconnected. The truth is, our life IS too expensive for us, which is why we got rid of it. The embarrassment is just crazy, because those cuts are actually a good thing — a sign that we’re bringing our life back within our means. And there’s no shame in that.  

Our country has a long history of keeping up with the Jones’, and I’ve never wanted to be like that, but when I see it creeping in to my behavior, I have to call it. I bet if I did a poll, a lot of women would say they’re living over their heads, and all of them are trying to cut out that extra spending right now. It seems to me that the more we just tell the truth, the more we realize we’re not alone in this, and the closer we are to actually getting our spending in line.

So I’m admitting it. I couldn’t really afford my phone (along with our two cell phones and taxes and mortgage and the kids day care and everything else….).

Do you struggle with shame around your budget cuts? Is there anything you’ve cut out that you’ve been reluctant to share with your friends and family? If so, why do you think that is?